I talk a lot about habituation because I believe that it’s our best hope to find lasting relief from tinnitus.
It’s not a cure, but it’s entirely possible to get to this place where it stops bothering us, a place where your brain can tune it out like it does all other meaningless background noise.
I’ve also talked a lot about the various strategies people use to habituate, all of which involve changing the way we react to the sound emotionally – the very obstacle that prevents habituation from happening in the first place.
But what I don’t talk about nearly enough is the extreme volatility of the process itself.
The Roller Coaster of Relief:
Progress is rarely ever linear and each day is not usually a little bit better than the day before.
The habituation process is a lot more like a roller coaster. It often feels like three steps forward, two steps back. And experiencing that kind of setback, especially after a string of good days, can feel devastating.
So it’s important to understand that spikes and difficult days are a part of the habituation process, and not a sign that you’ve gone backwards. Your progress has not been erased. You’ve just been triggered back into having the old reaction again.
When you work to replace the old emotional reaction of fear, frustration, anxiety, panic, and depression – it doesn’t just go away, even if you start having good days. But the new mental conditioning you’re working to establish doesn’t just go away when you have a spike either.
The Family Dynamic Analogy:
I’ll give you a great analogy. I work hard to be a better person. I actively try to improve myself on a daily basis, and it’s reflected in the way I act around friends and colleagues.
And then I visit my family in my childhood home, and I might as well be a teenager again. We all just start yelling over one another, pushing each other buttons.
Because the family dynamic never changed – that old pattern never went away. I just developed new patterns of behavior that are dominant most of the time. But being around my family triggers the old dynamic.
A very similar thing is happening on difficult days throughout the tinnitus habituation process. Remember, the goal of habituation is to create a new emotional pattern, a new response to the sound that enables your brain to automatically tune it out more and more of the time. But the old pattern of fear is deeply engrained and will be triggered repeatedly throughout the process.
So whatever strategy you use to habituate, whether it’s the tinnitus focused meditation techniques that I teach, or any other, it’s important to understand that spikes and setbacks are going to happen. And when they do, it’s probably going to feel like you’re back to square one. But you’re not.
The trick is to remember this when times get tough. And understanding that even if you can’t do anything to lower the volume when your tinnitus is spiking, you can always make yourself more relaxed, more comfortable, and able to cope more effectively. Because the spike will pass. It always does.
How to Measure Progress with Daily Fluctuations:
Understanding that tinnitus spikes are part of the process raises an interesting question: with so many ups and downs along the way, how can you possibly measure progress?
When you live with tinnitus, there’s a tendency to obsessively measure the sound, to constantly check if it’s louder than it was before. But it’s not a helpful way to quantify your progress with habituation.
Instead, simply take a step back and look at your overall quality of life.
Ask yourself, “Is my overall quality of life better than it was before? Has it improved over time? Am I doing more of the things I want to do be doing, and bothered less my tinnitus more of the time?”
If the answer to any of those questions is yes, then you know you’re on the right track.
Ultimately, habituation about improving quality of life, which is important, and something that not nearly enough doctors are talking about.